She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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