Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
