you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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