Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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