No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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