Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.