how can u be prego again
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I am available for nakedness
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
