My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
