***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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