Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
