no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
false alarm, still single
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
