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• (737): View more from Texas

  You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?

  (1-737): View more from Texas

  That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there

  (737): View more from Texas

  It's my parent's restaurant

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• (858): View more from California

  Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.

  (858): View more from California

  i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents

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• (904): View more from Florida

  i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.

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• (969): View more from

  I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (559): View more from California

  I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  The dysfunction is strong in this one.

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