you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
soo... how was my night?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
