I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize