My room smells like vodka and shame
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize