Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
