At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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