The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
