just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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