The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
how can u be prego again
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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