Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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