everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
i've created a new STD.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
