So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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