If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
