good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
