Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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