I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
