I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
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