We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
