FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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