I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
