Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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