and my herpes radar will keep us safe
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
