So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
