How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
