Where are you?
In a non slutty way
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
