I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
