I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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