In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
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