I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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