The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
