i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize