it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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