Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
