I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize