i wish my penis had a tongue
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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