I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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