YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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