you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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