I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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