I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize